5 Step Forgivenss Plan (Step 4)

Today, we cover step 4 in my 5 Step Forgiveness plan.

Step 4- Do something special to symbolize moving beyond

If you’ve followed the first three steps of this plan, you should be getting ready to finally release this old hurt from your life. You’ve already moved beyond the anger to what was really bothering you (step 1), then licked those wounds a bit (step 2), and figured out 3 positive things that came from this hurtful event (step 3). Now, you are ready to say goodbye to this unwelcome hurt in your life!

Start by picking a date on the calendar in the not too distant future, but at least a day or two out. Circle this date, and come up with a ritual or event to do on this date to symbolize letting go. It can be as big or little or complex or simple as you’d like it to be, as long as it feels right for you.

You could….

  • Give something or things away to create new space in your home
  • Make a donation to someone in need
  • Do something nice/special with someone else
  • Treat yourself to a massage, a day off from work, new sheets or towels or something to represent new life in your home
  • Burn pictures or letters that represent the past
  • Write a letter to the person or yourself thanking them for what you learned from this event
  • Burry something symbolic or create a time capsule of some kind
  • Burn some sage to clear negative energy from your home
  • Take a long walk where you picture pieces of this old injury falling by the wayside as you move, and when you come to the end you’ll have no more burden left to carry

It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as it feels right for you!

Next, consciously perform the ritual and remind yourself along they way why you are doing this. Be aware of what you feel and experience and allow yourself to feel those feelings.

The more we ignore or try to avoid negative feelings, the more power they have over us.  Which is exactly what gets us into the pattern of holding onto resentment and anger in the first place.  So don’t ignore anything that comes up… just notice it. You’ll find making peace with whatever comes us is effortless when you simply acknowledge it.