Happy New Year!
With 2011 freshly starting, and everyone still motivated to keep their new year’s resolutions I think now is a great time for us to discuss change. As a therapist, I get asked this question all the time: “Can people change?” The answer…. YES, ABSOLUTELY!
Change, growth, healing, whatever you want to call it, is totally possible, and is possible for each and every person. There’s just one catch, you can’t change someone else you can only change yourself.
This distinction is so important, and where so many people end up going wrong. Happiness, whether in a relationship, with yourself, in life overall, with your physical appearance, or at work only can come from one place… YOU. No matter where you’ve come from, what you’ve been through, what your goals in life are, your level of happiness is entirely up to you.
It’s a funny example, but The Bachelor this season is an excellent illustration of this.
Here’s a guy who had some pretty serious commitment issues, who went on a reality TV show to find love because he believed he’d find happiness through someone else. He believed, as so many of us do, that his lack of love was because of other people; the right woman hadn’t entered his life. Ultimately, he discovered that his lack of love and happiness had nothing to do with the women, or lack of the right woman, it came from within him.
If there was one lesson I’d wish everyone could learn in their lifetime, this would be it. Because once you get this concept, once you understand your part in your happiness, the possibilities become endless. Change, growth, happiness are so possible. I see it everyday, in my clients, in my own life, and in the people around me. All it takes is learning where to look for it, and who to look for it from.
Keep checking back this month for more posts about changing your life.