So, as you can tell, lately I’ve been neglecting my poor blog! Not because I don’t have things to say, but because I have so many things to say I can’t seem to stick with and finish a topic. The downfall of having your passion, be your work! 😉
As I blocked out time in my upcoming weekend to tackle a few posts and get organized it got me thinking about self-care, and how it relates to self-esteem.
Self-Care or Selfish?
I know for some people “self care” is a four-letter word (two of them, in fact), but really self-care is a great way to strengthen our self-worth. I often talk to clients and friends who say putting aside time for themselves feels “selfish” and therefore never do it. They have a sense of pride that comes from working themselves to the bone on a regular basis. What’s interesting to me, is these same people tend to have crisis after crisis in their lives and always feel rundown, unorganized, and totally anxious.
It’s not coincidence that this is how their lives unfold. Never taking time for ourselves is a recipe to living life this way- anxious, stressed out, tired, cranky.
Usually when we explore this concept together they begin to see the pattern and realize that it’s actually their lack of self-worth that keeps them for self-care routines. In other words, they don’t feel worth the time attention pampering and relaxation that self-care provides. Sound familiar?
Changing This Pattern
The simplest most direct to begin altering this thought pattern and belief is by changing our intention around self-care.
Instead of doing self-care rituals because we feel worth-it, do them because we want to feel worth-it. If you feel shaky, nervous, or undeserving while brainstorming, scheduling, and/or doing self-care acts remind yourself, “I am doing this so that I will feel better about myself. This is my path to better self-esteem.”
Also, remember it’s important to take baby steps in setting up self-care routines for yourself, especially if you are new to self-care. And, self-care can be done through the simplest things…
- Splurge on a wine that’s a touch more expensive than you usually spend
- Take time to make yourself a yummy cup of tea
- Relax in a bath with your favorite expensive bath salts
- Say “no” to just one thing this week.
- Turn off your computer 20 minutes earlier than usual at night
- Schedule a massage, acupuncture, mani/pedi
- Take a long walk WITHOUT your cell phone
- Treat yourself to a new book, album, movie
It doesn’t matter which you do, as long as you do something, and remind yourself when it feels selfish, “I am doing this to be a better me. I will have more to give, I will feel better, I will feel worth-it if I do this for myself.”
As for me, I am still going to work on some blog posts this weekend BUT I am going to set a timer, and only spend the 2 hours I set aside each day on writing. With my other 22 hours I am going to walk, picnic, hang with my hubby, grill, sleep, maybe catch a movie and relax so I am refreshed and my best me, for me, and for my clients, next week!