The 5 Love Languages

Is anyone else struggling with worse than normal allergies this year?

Man, my energy and creativity have been hijacked by allergies lately which is why things have been running so late on my blog.  I want to apologize for the delay in getting not only this post done but May’s Newsletter out and the free MP3 I promised. Both May’s Newsletter and the free MP3 of my favorite relaxation technique will follow shortly…. I promise!

Today I want to share my final (for this month) tool that I like to keep in my toolbox…. The 5 Love Languages.

The 5 Love Languages is a book by Gary Chapman that helps us understand that we all have a different “love language,” or ways that we hear/feel/experience love.   So if we know our partner’s love language then we are better able to make them feel loved, supported, cared for, and important to us.   Great ability to have in a relationship, right?!

The 5 Love Languages are:

  1. Gifts- small non-expensive tokens of appreciation, for example homemade cards and notes, fresh picked flowers, a cup of coffee
  2. Acts of Service- doing actual tasks, for example the dishes, making the bed, washing the car
  3. Physical Touch- which is not sex, but cuddling, hand holding, back rubs….
  4. Quality Time- time spent together talking with no other distractions (like the TV)
  5. Words of Affirmation- using words to tell someone how you feel about them, what you appreciate about them, or what they have done well

I am telling you, knowing, understanding, and using your partners love language can really restore and deepen your relationship!

But personally, I keep this book in my toolbox because this love languages idea transcends romantic relationships and helps me have better relationships all around!

4 other relationships The 5 Love Languages can help to restore and deepen

  • Yourself. Knowing what love language you are allows you to create more effective and healing self-care strategies. (Like when you have allergies for example!)
  • Your Kids. Using their love language allows them to really feel your love and support in a whole new way; you are speaking their language and telling them that they are OK just as they are when you use their love language.
  • Your Friends. Again, helps you to better support and connect with your friends and understand why they want/need certain things from your friendship.
  • Your parents. Being aware of your parents love language can help you better connect with and help your parents AND better understand why they may be asking certain things of you.

And don’t forget, knowing someone’s love language also helps to better understand the other side of things as well. Meaning, there may be many things you are unknowingly doing that hurt the people you care about because of their love language.  For example, if your friend is a Quality Time person and you tend to flake or show up late for the plans you make together, this will create more hurt in this relationship then it will it someone with Gifts as a love language.

Click here to discover your love language and learn more about this book.